there is seriously no place like home.

i'm trying to figure out the best way to share our awful exhausting loud long tiring great trip to san francisco without droning on and on about how awesome it is traveling with 18 month-old twins. so here goes.

first mistake: not booking outrageously expensive non-stop flight to san francisco.  believe me, it would have been worth it.  arrive at airport to find our flight to minneapolis has already been delayed.  lily waits in line while bryan pushes boys around so liam's restless screams don't fill the terminal (naptime has been interrupted by said delayed flight).  wonderful man behind counter does the best he can and finds us seats on the next available flight from minneapolis to san francisco - FIRST CLASS SEATS.  stroll around the airport, feeling high on life and loving delta prematurely, as they will shortly be taking their first flight flying first class... or so they think (insert evil laugh here).  board airplane and prepare for a short 58 minute flight up to minnesota.  hear flight attendant come over speaker to tell passengers we are 8 people over the weight limit, so will be needing volunteers:  as a consolation for volunteering, receive $400 travel vouchers and be guaranteed a later flight.  take off 50 minutes later than scheduled as a result of the fat-ness on the plane.  arrive in minneapolis only to be put in a holding pattern because of weather (later discovering it was golf ball-sized hail).  holding, holding, holding... diverted to rochester because of weather.  land in rochester at 6:30 pm.  filled in on plan: re-fuel, get back in the air within 15 minutes and back to minneapolis.  sweet.  wait for fuel truck.  wait for fuel truck.  watch as severe weather slowly approaches rochester. wait for fuel -- another plane pulls in in front of us, having also been diverted to this dinky airport. check watch: 7:30.  continue stuffing food in boys' mouths.  say a quick 'thank you god' for my sweet boys who did surprisingly well, given the situation.  finally get fuel in plane.  hear pilot come over speaker telling us we cannot reverse the plane, therefore we cannot take off because other plane is also getting fuel, and is blocking our way out. check watch: 8:00.  call delta and get booked on 9:30 (last flight of the day) to san francisco.  other plane moves, finally take off at 8:30.  land in minneapolis at 9:00, wishfully thinking if we run like hell, we can still make the 9:30 flight.  oh, wait a minute, someone's occupying our gate!  sit on runway for 30 minutes.  if you've figured out the math, you've figured out that our last flight has left the building.  with empty seats on it because they didn't want to wait for more severe weather to hit.  along with 14 million other disgruntled people pissed off at delta, stand in line to see what prize we get for enduring such hell.  well, lily gets the radisson and bryan gets holiday inn.  apparently, you scan your boarding pass and the machine spits out what it thinks you deserve.  we were good, i guess, because others only got meal vouchers.  whoa.  luckily, i was able to call the radisson and plead with them, trying not to lose it, so bryan and the kids could in fact, stay at the same hotel as me.  stand in line at baggage claim (where those 14 million other people somehow were already), only to be told it was going to be an hour for our bags.  check watch: 10:30.  talk to other family also flying to san francisco, told we were not getting our bags.  NOT.  they were going on to the west coast without us.  only two people working in baggage claim that night, not happening, lily losing it, tears streaming, father of other family making sure i was ok, hearing liam and finn crying and not caring that other people maybe thought i was a bad parent for not having enough energy to feed them more food tend to them...  making it to the radisson, managing to get a hotel room with 2 bathrooms (what?!) and enough space for the boys to roam, and climbing (completely. wiped. out.) into our sleep number bed at midnight, all the while cursing delta's name...

stay tuned for part two: the good part - san francisco!


oh, and if you're wondering about the first class, it was only a dream... different flight, different seats, sad bryan and lily.